Jun 25, 2018
After learning of Anthony Bourdain’s death, I recorded a solo podcast episode about depression, suicide, showing up for people and talking about mental health BEFORE a crisis… and continuing to talk about it when it is not sensationalized anymore.
I decided not to share the episode because, truth be told, it all still feels pretty fresh to me and speaking about this is totally a vulnerability stretch. I still carry FEAR and SHAME and JUDGMENT about my experience and about my interpretation of that experience (because at the end of the day, that is all us humans are really doing, right?)
I started prepping tomorrow's episode with Luke Storey and was brought to tears as I was listening. For many reasons; this one really dives in, y’all. But something he said struck a deep chord and reminded me of my WHY for sharing these personal, vulnerable experiences and perspectives, even when (especially when) it is scary as shit.
Luke said: “My story is the why. The why is because I have suffered so much, and I’m sure some people have suffered way more than I, but my suffering is my suffering and your suffering is your suffering. And it is profound, and it hurt, and I have found ways to transmute that suffering into healing and into growth and dare I say, even some degree of enlightenment and spiritual awakening and wisdom. So what a self destructive thing, in a sense, to do, to withhold that from the world, from other people, and to withhold the experience of sharing that for myself.”
So here it is. Nervous, messy, and imperfect as it is.